The Sexy Lamp Love Interest

An issue in romance character writing I’ve been seeing more of lately is the “sexy lamp”. For those of you who aren't familiar (which I myself wasn't even familiar with the term until recently), a sexy lamp is a love interest or character who has virtually no traits other than being attractive and offers very little to the plot. While this term originally a critique of surface level female characters and misogyny, the term has started to encompass male characters as well. And whether or not you agree with the broadening of the term, it’s the best one I’ve found that describes the issues with a certain male character type: the male love interest in a female-led romance.  

This is being seen across the spectrum of archetypes, from “feminist”, “soft boy”, “golden retriever” archetypes to “bad boy”, “mafia boss”, and “dominant” archetypes. No matter where I turn in female-led romances lately, there’s some version of a cardboard cutout of a man I’m meant to swoon over. Take for example the latest culprit of this issue on my shelf, But How Are You Really by Ella Dawson. The book itself tackles some really pressing issues: LGBTQ, biphobia, abuse cycles, truly the works — but the main love interest, Reece, does virtually nothing for the story. He has no personality whatsoever past being a good listener (which requires no action on his part) and he’s only notable because the main character, Charlotte, is attracted to him. The only plot relevance he has is driving a wedge between Charlotte’s friendship with her best friend and driving her to and from the airport, both of which could easily be taken out of the narrative with no effect on the overall story. In other words, he’s a sexy lamp! 

But why is a sexy lamp character bad and how do you fix it? The answer to both, once again, is quite simple (who knew!). Sexy lamps are bad because they clog up narratives with unnecessary detail if they’re side characters and, in the case of romance books, make the romance lackluster, generic and just plain boring! Dawson had a really good concept and theme framework, but her story ultimately fell flat because her main component: romance, was dulled by the fact that her love interest didn’t pull his weight. Love interests are supposed to make the reader invested. They up the tension, create good chemistry and make you root for a happy ending — none of which a sexy lamp can do. Instead, they're just an empty husk the reader can project their needs and wants onto, which works for some readers, but for most I think they’d rather be infuriated by a character they don’t agree with and has a personality they personally can’t stand than to read a romance that feels...pointless. 

The simple way to avoid this scenario of boring and annoying the very people you intend to entertain is to just flesh out your characters. You establish real character traits they have, a backstory, a distinctive voice, and you decide what exactly they want in your narrative — not what they want for others, but what they want for themselves. Do they want to feel accepted? Do they want to know and feel love? Do they want a steamy exciting love affair? Do they want a safe space to land after a particularly harrowing experience? Find their why and they become active participants in the narrative, because they actually have something to say and do! The reason Reece, in my opinion, doesn’t work is that he wants for nothing. His only motivation is to support Charlotte in her healing journey and to be in a relationship with her. He doesn’t seem to have any wants or needs, so he doesn't actually do anything. He just sits there while Charlotte is charmed by his proclivity to listen to her interrupted. And he continues to be bland when Charlotte’s inevitable outbursts and triggers come out full force and he just... doesn’t really acknowledge it. I’m convinced that Charlotte could murder someone in cold blood in front of him and he would still find a way to be unphased. 

Romance is emotion, passion, action. Therefore, finding a way to have your main character and your love interest display these characteristics is always a better idea. If you struggle to establish your characters, no worries! Because so many of my clients struggled with the exact same problem, I have a character planner and workbook you can use as a guideline for character work. I also have coaching sessions available for those who need a bit more help than just a planner/template. There, we’ll go over all the components of book planning that help you write a cohesive and decent first draft. And if you’re interested in my overall thoughts of But How Are You Really or just really want to see the example of a sexy lamp for yourself, consider checking out our review here. 

Thank me later and Happy Writing!